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Biden did it… Why can’t I??

As coincidence would have it, I’ve been trying to work the F-bomb into my everyday life. As a reformed religionist, I’ve decided it would be empowering to assert my right to use words of all lengths, including the 4-letter variety.


Years of religion and parenthood have had me mentally saying one thing, but verbally spewing another. Though I’ve perfected the art of euphemism, inside my head I swear like a sailor. Now has come the time to semi-merge my thoughts with my tongue. I will no longer remain profanely repressed!

However…. This is harder than one might think.


I’ve become an astute observer of others and how they work it (the F-ster) into their sentences. Kudo’s to Biden, THAT was a good one! I wish I were as smooth.


As Biden demonstrated, there are daily opportunities to work the f-ditty into my daily vocab. I work 40 hours a week, I am a parent of a teen aged daughter, I have dogs who the dog whisperer could not whisper to…. there are opportunities! Alas, it is a struggle. .


On a typical day….


Mentally: FUCK!

Verbally: DAMN-IT-ALL-TO-HECK

Mentally: Damn-it-all-to-heck?!? Really?!? That was fucking weak. Try again!


(next chance to let it drop)


Mentally: FUCK!!!

Verbally: Frickin Hell!

Mentally: oh jeezusfuckingchrist! It’s f-u-c-k.


(next chance)


Mentally: FUCK!!!

Verbally: That was really….. Fff…

Mentally: You paused! Why are you pausing?!?

Verbally: Fuck*choke*ed up

Mentally: What was that? You choked on the word! You fucking wussy!


It’s not easy….. fuck no, it’s definitely not. Perhaps I will just keep with my euphemistic ways… After all, as my daughter once oh-so-wisely told me, “Mom, we KNOW what you’re reeeeally saying….”