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Color Blind….

Have you ever lost something, like…. um… your keys?? You try and retrace your steps and places you might have left them. You close your eyes and picture your kitchen counter and that dish towel that you tossed, ever so carelessly, onto it. “Ah-ha!”, you run to the counter…. lift the dish towel…. and….. it’s…. not there. Hmph! You close your eyes again, this time remembering how you plunked down onto the couch and you vaguely recall the sound of something dropping…. “But of course! Under the sofa!” You then run over to the sofa, get on your hands and knees, and peek under….. but…. nothing.

And so it goes….. you seemingly can SEE your key in your minds eye every single place you can think of imagining it at.

Tell me that your brain does the same thing. Please, let me not be the only one who has a brain with a sick sense of humor!

I bet you think this mind spew is about my losing something again. But it’s not. It’s about colored paper.

Supervisor: This is to be printed out on Goldenrod, you’ll need to print it again.

Me: That’s not Goldenrod?

Supervisor: No, it’s Buff… you need to print it on Goldenrod.

Me: Oh….

Goldenrod has orange hues in it.

Me: Oh….

And now I’m back to cursing my joke-playing-minds-eye. The copy room is loaded with paper, none of which is labeled. I’ve not memorized the names, nor the shades of each stack of paper. Once they are stripped bare of their wrapping, I am lost as to their identities. When I see them all together, I can , with some effort, distinguish the subtle variations. But, when they stray from that room, like today, my mind cant seem to tell them apart. I feel like I’m going to have to make a cheat-sheet color wheel, like a Mary Kay consultant testing for skin tones… I’ll whip it out, hold it to the paper, and whisper, “yesssss….. this one, no…. wait…. this one! This one is a perfect match. We have ourselves here a perfect shade of Astrobrite Cosmic Orange.”

Meanwhile, I will just have to fake it. I will learn to read my supervisors face… watch for the disapproving facial twitches that suggest my hand move one level up to the next shade of paper…. slowly bringing it down, hoping beyond all hope that I’m not mistaking Merry Mango for Melancholy Melon.